Monday, May 22, 2017


Wednesday, May 10, 2017

lost girls

she closed her eyes 
the time had come
to go where 
her innocence
was taken.

but lost girls look for places to go
far away from reality.

she swallowed her secrets
never to tell
deadlocked in time
her story stays there
it remains
concealed and unopened
until it is freed. 

but lost girls look for places to go
far away from reality.

what is it
you've said
without saying it?
what is
your heart
telling me?

i'm a broken piano
in need of mending
this lost girl is weary 
and tired of pretending
all of my words
are heavy 
and so hard
to speak.

please come
sweet lost girl
and pour out
your story
and lament
your reality.

jesus is waiting
and listening.
he wants you
to come and
be free.

– michelle 

* written for all the lost girls who've no one to tell. 

he hears the cries of your heart.
and i hear them too.

you matter. 
your story matters. 

we're praying for you. 

copyright © 2017

Broken Pianos and Mending Hearts

Friday, May 5, 2017

the holy invitation

adobe stock

the old. the shabby. the worn. 

hurting hearts, broken bodies, and crushed spirits. 

sickness, pain, and trauma. 

scars and stories deadlocked in time. 

it's all an invitation for Him to come in and heal – a holy invitation.

restoration is His business. and while there are just some things only Jesus can do; He often uses other people to help us get there. 

we can't do it on our own. we need Him. and we need each other. 

~ Michelle

Michelle Holderman
Copyright © 2017

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Salt and Light

13 “Let me tell you why you are here. You’re here to be salt-seasoning that brings out the God-flavors of this earth. If you lose your saltiness, how will people taste godliness? You’ve lost your usefulness and will end up in the garbage.

14-16 Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.”

Matthew 5:13-16 – The Message (MSG)

Saturday, April 15, 2017

The Promise Is Coming


I keep hearing those words over and over again from Holy Spirit. In fact, I've been hearing them for many days now, including today, and I've been pressing in and seeking the Lord for more understanding. Actually, there has been a lot of labor, resistance, and interference involved, which tells me this must be quite important.

I don't profess to know it all, but I am getting from Him that "The Promise" means different things for different people. Yet it is fully rooted in the promises of God (2 Corinthians 1:20) for our lives, our families, the body of Christ, and even cities and nations. And this is certainly happening at the direction of the Father.

I also believe this has everything to do with Him taking us further into both our individual and collective destinies in Jesus. And I really feel an excitement attached to this too.

This is ultimately a Kingdom thing. And there will be some necessary uprooting and tearing down of certain things that have already served their purpose, are hindering what the Father wants to newly plant and build, or were never of Him in the first place and must be removed. There will be hidden things uncovered too. So don't be surprised by the exposure this carries.

Lastly, I’m hearing Him say there are greater days ahead that are going to blow our minds. This is a time that is truly being orchestrated by Heaven itself for the greatest move of God we’ve ever known.

He is intentionally joining people together for His purpose. So I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to be in the place the Father wants each of us to be. It doesn’t matter what anyone else says, thinks, or does – be where He wants you to be; nothing more and nothing less.

I don't believe it's a coincidence that the Holy Spirit is repeatedly speaking these words during this week - Holy Week and Passover Week. I think there is great significance in it – almost like Heaven is making an announcement during this holy time. And I know I’m not the only one feeling it or perceiving it either.

I really feel there is more to this but I can only share what I've been given. However, I do believe we are going to see a pairing of God's love and power within this time in ways we've never known or seen before. In other words, the magnitude of His love and power is going to astound many of us.

So with that, I declare to you, as the Holy Spirit has been specifically declaring to me,


In His Love.


(I'm sharing this at His direction so please weigh these words by the Spirit)

Michelle Holderman
Copyright © 2017

Friday, March 31, 2017

A Word Of Encouragement From The Lord

I'm hearing the LORD say –

"Position yourselves before Me; for I AM about to move in ways you've not known or seen. 

There's a lot of speculation in your heart regarding what I will and will not do. 

All you need to know is I AM faithful to finish what I've started. Let those be the words that carry you into this day and all the days to follow. And place your worry at My feet. Your job is not to worry nor are you to hold onto your concerns. 

I AM calling you to come up higher with Me so you must let go of what weighs you down. Let it go, My beloved. Let it go and watch how I will lift you up. 

An eagle soars higher by stretching its wings out and allowing the wind to take it to greater heights. 

So it is with Me.

Stretch out your wings of faith and trust Me to take you higher. For truly, I AM the wind beneath your wings. 

Don't focus on everything and everyone else. Instead, focus on Me. I AM your life source and I love you with an everlasting love that is pure and clean. 

Be still, beloved; and let Me show you what's on My heart for you to know. 

Listen for My holy whispers. For surely I will whisper My words of spirit and life into your weary soul and ignite you with a fresh grace to carry on. 

Let Me tell you the plans I have for you. Let Me lift you into a higher love. 

I want to leave you with a question to ponder: Do you trust Me? 

The answer to this will determine how far you will allow Me to take you. 

Trust Me with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding but allow Me to direct your path and see how you will take flight.

I AM whispering – I love you. Trust Me." 

Michelle Holderman
Copyright © 2017 

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Beauty For Ashes: A Holy Work

So there I was looking at this pile of ashes I call my life; when I started to see these unfamiliar, unexpected pieces lying underneath. And I thought to myself, "What are those? And what in the world am I supposed to do with them?" 

It's strange because I thought I knew all the pieces. I thought I'd taken proper inventory. I thought I had, but there they were – residues of truth waiting for me to uncover.

This is all metaphorical, of course, but there is a lot of verity in it – years of chronic illness and trauma; years of misdiagnosis and loss; years of suffering and pain; years of working to recover.

Some of this is better and some is still an ongoing work. And perhaps, to some degree, it will remain a work in progress.

I've always tried to see the positive – the proverbial silver lining – in things despite the challenge or adversity. I've always looked for the blessing in disguise. I have always had this inner drive that when the going gets tough; the tough get going. And those are good things. The right perspective and attitude are important.

I've also developed a deep trust in the Lord and His timing, taking things to Him in prayer, which helps keep me grounded and rooted in Him and His promises. This is important too.

Still, one has to take a long, hard look at the truth of their lives and get real.

So as I've spent many of these years getting to know Him more intimately, continually learning, growing, and being trained in the things of God and His Kingdom, all while working to find answers and heal, I've also discovered those aforementioned pieces I didn't know were there – inner places of frozen pain and sorrow. 

Places I'd not given Him access to because I didn't know they even existed. 

But now I do and we're working on them together.

Through it all, I have learned His presence in our places of deepest pain is how true healing begins. 

And He does show up –

He shows up in our struggle. He shows up in our heartache. He shows up in our anger. He shows up in our fear. He shows up in our secrets. He shows up in our numbness. He shows up in our scars. He shows up in our despair. He shows up in our doubt. He shows up in our mess. He shows up in our disappointment. He shows up in our brokenness. 

He shows up in our story.

He shows up in places we didn't even know were there. 

He shows up at unexpected times and in unexpected ways.

And when He does; we wrestle. 

We wrestle with every "Why?" that we carry.

We wrestle with silence and unanswered prayers. 

We wrestle with bruises from the past and the present.

We wrestle with suffering, injustice, and not understanding. 

We wrestle with Him. 

But that's also when His grace and truth begin to dissolve our barriers, defenses, and illusions. That's when His love and compassion begin to invade the innermost crevices of our hearts. That's when His light and hope begin to spark something fresh and new within us. 

It is often a process that involves our personal willingness and participation, but it's one that eventually leads to genuine transformation. And it usually involves the people and the pieces He's chosen to be a part of our healing journey.

Let me add that this process doesn't happen just for the sake of it happening. Jesus isn't only interested in results or a good outcome; although He cares about such things.

His greatest interest is in us and the condition of our hearts because He knows heart issues hold the key to how we function in life. He knows waving a magic wand over our problems and making them instantly disappear isn't the remedy we need.

He's most interested in healing the things we don't always understand or even realize are in need of mending. He's interested, not so much in our ongoing personal comfort, but in the state of this "heart," which is the source or wellspring of our whole lives.

He knows what we are in need of; even more than we do. Therein lies both the wisdom and the mystery of the transforming nature of Christ. 

In transforming us, He transforms our pain.

And that is the ultimate exchange of beauty for ashes.

It's quite a holy work.

~ Michelle

Michelle Holderman
Copyright © 2017 

Friday, February 24, 2017

Deborah and Esther: God's Dynamic Duo For This Time

The Father is raising up Deborah's and Esther's together for the advancement of His Kingdom. What they could not do on their own, they will be more than able to do and accomplish together. The one will help to empower the other because the promises of God bind them together. And the Holy Spirit will set them out as the Father so wills and purposes. 

He's had His eye on His Deborah's and Esther's for a long while now. He's calling them His dynamic duo because their impact is greater together. These mighty women of God have paid a high price to go where they are going, but they said yes to the call a long time ago.

So now is the time for Holy Spirit to begin setting them out in their mutual work and assignments. They are women of valor and truth. And they’ve been handpicked by Heaven for this time. 

The Spirit of God says –

"Get ready for My Deborah's and My Esther's to rise up together. We will be a three-fold cord that's not easily broken.

I will send them into the spheres the Lord has chosen for them to walk in together. And they will walk in unity. They will walk in His love and power.

They are carriers of My justice, order, and truth. And because they are on Heaven's mission, I will supply them with the resources they need.

Above all, they carry the heart and fragrance of Jesus. They live and move and have their being in Him. For it is from out of their intimacy with Christ they'll know how to do the work He wants. Because of this, they will be like a breath of fresh air. And it is truly the air or breath of Heaven they are going to bring with them."

~ Michelle

Michelle Holderman
Copyright © 2017 

"Perhaps you were born into the Kingdom for such a time as this." Esther 4:14 

"Two are better than one because they can reap more benefit from their labor." Ecclesiastes 4:9 

"For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10

Photo: Adobe Stock

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Something New Is Starting In 2017

I hear the Father saying He is ALREADY making a way for you, and it's not by power or might but by His Spirit He is doing this. 

He says it is all coming together by the working of Holy Spirit. 

The force with which you are being pressed on feels extremely uncomfortable, but it's good because the Father is aligning you with Heaven's perfect order and timing, which include the right people at the right place at the right time. And the reason this is happening is because it is time for the new thing the Father has ordained for your life. 

By the end of the month, you are going to start seeing this take shape and form. What you haven't been able to understand or get ahold of, even now, will start to come into better focus by the end of January and get progressively clearer through April. 

I really feel this in my spirit so strongly! 

It has been such a long, difficult road but this is the start of something wonderful that only the Father can do for you. 

He is writing a whole new chapter in your story. 

The notes of a new song are beginning to play for you. 

A new sun is about to rise on your brand new day. 


Michelle Holderman
Copyright © 2017

Friday, January 13, 2017

All Our Pieces

You know those painful, messy, broken, worn pieces we don't let too many people see? Yeah, those. Well, Jesus sees and knows. He knows we all have some pieces that are in need of mending. He sees and hears those bruised places calling out for His beautiful touch.

And sometimes we just need to be reminded that HE LOVES US THROUGH IT ALL. That He aches when we ache. That He weeps with us. That we aren't alone.

We don't have to pretend
 or perform. We don't have to try and act fine when we're really not because He already knows the truth of our scars and stories. He's already seeing us eye-to-eye and heart-to-heart. 

He's already reaching for us through the grief, anger, disappointment, and fear. He's already piercing through our filters, disconnections, and vulnerabilities. 

Yes, He walks right into our shambles, right into the messiness of it all, and finds us on the floor in our dark night of the soul. And He gets down and pulls us tightly into His kindness and compassion, and He lets us kick and scream and cry and let it all out. 

He lets us feel our deep ache. And He feels it right along with us. He knows how to hold us in our brokenness and ashes while loving us into His beauty and grace.

Then somehow we know we really are important to Him.

Somehow we understand this gut-wrenching stuff - our suffering, heartache, trauma, sorrow, hurt, and struggle - really does matter.

We can see He loves us in our deepest, darkest lows as much as He does in our greatest, sparkling heights.

We suddenly realize He chose to step into our world, and our pain, on purpose.

We get, maybe even for the first time, He truly came for us and all of our pieces. 

And that changes everything.

~ Michelle 

Michelle Holderman
Copyright © 2017

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed. Psalm 34:17 NLT